Forgiveness is what Christians do

Erika Kirk’s speech at the memorial service for her husband on Sept. 21, 2025, will never be forgotten. It was an astounding display of poise and self-control, but above all it was an act of obedience to the revealed will of God in Scripture. She forgave her husband’s assassin. She shared how much pain the death of her loving husband had caused, leaving no doubt about the size of the hole in her heart. But then she paused before uttering the fateful words and struggled to go on. In a voice that was barely louder than a whisper she managed to choke out the words that because Christ on the cross said, “Father forgive them for they know not what they do,” she also forgave the man who killed her beloved husband.

What she was doing was obviously an act of Christian obedience. We all know the words Jesus taught us in the Lord’s Prayer: “and forgive us our debts as we have forgiven our debtors.” Jesus didn’t make forgiveness an option. It isn’t just something for the super-spiritual elite. It is what Christians do. It is discipleship, following Jesus’ example and obeying his commands. Erika Kirk lived out her faith in that crucial moment.

She was speaking to an audience of between 90,000 and 100,000 people. According to the New York Post, the cable TV audience was 20 million and another 100 million people watched across internet streams. The gospel was preached in that service by Charlie’s pastor, by Marco Rubio, and by many others. But Erika lived the gospel message in front of a global audience. She said that Charlie had dedicated his life to reaching out to lost young men just like the killer and bringing them hope and purpose. She carried on his work right then and there.

The full impact of this astonishing act of grace over the next few years is impossible to imagine. God alone, in his wise and fatherly providence, knows what is going to happen but we can trust him to do good as Romans 8:28 promises.

This act of forgiveness should have melted the most hardened heart and should have shaken the most hate-filled atheist. Reaction from both the left and the right was mostly admiration and awe.

Some wondered if she had the right to do that. Did she mean that she did not want the killer to be punished by the law? Christians might point out that in Romans 12:19 Paul tells us, “Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.’” A few verses later, Paul says that the governing authorities have “no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God” (Romans 13:1). He then says that the magistrate is God’s servant who bears the sword in order to carry out God’s wrath on the wrongdoer (Romans 13:4).

Paul teaches clearly here that our duty as individuals is to forgive, but the duty of the government is to punish evildoers. In a Christian country the government punishes those who commit murder and the victims are called to repay evil with good. He sums it up by saying “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good” (Romans 12:21). The police, the prosecutor, the judge, the jury, and all instruments of the state must do their job and punish the man responsible for committing this heinous crime in order that justice might be done and other potential assassins deterred.

But Erika Kirk offered grace and the gospel to Tyler Robinson, and we will have to see if the Holy Spirit works in Robinson’s heart and enables him to accept that grace. We have no way to know what will happen with this lost young man. But it is safe to predict that, given the tens of millions who watched, there will be other young men who will hear the gospel of forgiveness and grace and turn to Christ in repentance and faith. That will not restore a husband and father to his earthly family, but the eternal impact on those who are saved and those whose lives they touch is incalculable.

Christianity affirms realism about the evils and sorrows that are so difficult to endure in this world. But we know by faith that it all ends with joy unspeakable. As Paul put it, even though it is true that “For your sake we are being killed all the day long” it is also true that nothing, not even death, “can separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:36-39).