What’s the White House worth?

According to the Zillow online real estate database, 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. NW in Washington, D.C., has only three bedrooms and two baths, but its market value is $395 million. The 55,000-square-foot size has something to do with that pricing, but a prime location and some historical interest may also play a role. Although Zillow states the property is “off-market” now, I’ve read in the gossip sheets that the current occupant will vacate it on Jan. 20.

Some other Zillow info: The site “Zestimates” that rent would go for $2,079,490 a month and that the property will appreciate 1.6 percent over the next year. Nearby schools in Washington are Thomson Elementary, with a 7 out of 10 rating, and Wilson High, but it’s only 6 out of 10. Zillow included a disclaimer: “School attendance zone boundaries are provided by a third party and subject to change. Check with the applicable school district prior to making a decision based on these boundaries.”

Zillow says an upscale bathroom remodel would cost $59,000 but only bring $55,000 in added value. Garage door replacement and fiberglass attic insulation could be worth doing, though. The proposed down payment is $79 million, but if you buy it you could “make your home a fortress” by improving security: “24/7 protection is just $14.99/mo. … No long-term contracts, so you’re free to cancel anytime.”

The website also has photos of pretty White House rooms. If you look at the listing, under “Contact a Local Agent,” you can insert your name and phone number and state, “I own this home and would like to learn more about selling 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. NW” You can’t sell it but you do own it, as a U.S. citizen.