Weekend Reads: Parental and spiritual growth

The Parent Map: Navigating the Way to Raising Great Kids

By Harold J. Sala

Many parenting gurus, speaking of the laws of God and how to instill correct behavior in your child, quote Deuteronomy 6:6–7 (ESV), “[T]hese words that I command you. … You shall teach them diligently to your children. …” That’s not where Harold J. Sala begins. He goes back a verse: “You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.” In other words, if you do not love God, then all the child training in the world will be pointless. Your children can sense what’s important to you. If you do not live the beliefs you profess, you are almost certain to raise rebels. But The Parent Map: Navigating the Way to Raising Great Kids (OMF Literature, 2013) doesn’t linger on the negative. It occupies itself with basic truths about child raising.

Don’t go to Sala for deep biblical exegesis, hidden parenting secrets, or highly academic information. You won’t find these things. What you will find is straightforward, practical, accessible principles of parenting. Sala patiently explodes the idea that children are stupid. If they see their parents lying, they will lie. If they see their parents drinking too much, they will drink too much. And so on. Children imitate. If you are undisciplined, you cannot possibly discipline your children. Just as a loving relationship is the context of God’s law in Deuteronomy 6, so it must be the context of your house rules. So listen to your kids, even when you don’t want to. Parent with the purpose of communicating to your children a passion for the kingdom of God. Embrace your influence, rather than throwing it away!

The law is important. But the relationship is all-important. Sala gets that truth. If you don’t, then read him.

Developing Healthy Spiritual Growth: Knowledge, Practice, Experience

By Joel Beeke

In a manner reminiscent of the old Puritans, but devoid of their somewhat archaic sentence structure, Joel Beeke has written a little manual of Christian growth. Basically an exposition of Colossians 1:9–14, Developing Healthy Spiritual Growth: Knowledge, Practice, Experience (Evangelical Press, 2013) is so packed with good advice that it needs to be read a bit at a time. For example, under the “practice” section, Beeke lists 16 practical things a believer can do to grow in Christ, including go to church, read the Bible with your family, budget time for prayer and evangelism, and exercise hospitality and have conversations about God with your guests.

For someone who’s starting with little Christian knowledge and very few Christian habits, Developing Healthy Spiritual Growth is a tremendous resource. Even for those who already practice the 16 things (I found that I habitually do 15 of them), the sections on knowledge and experience are very rich.

Beeke has mined many Christian authors, and woven their words expertly into his overall structure. Rather than saying, “You don’t see sanctification till after the fact,” he quotes John Flavel, who said that spiritual growth is like the growth of plants, “which we perceive … rather to have grown than to grow.”

“Spiritual growth is a progressive experience of the all-sufficiency of Christ,” Beeke says. In other words, Christianity is not summed up in knowledge about God and humble obedience to His will. It also has a strong experiential component. This is found not in wild charismatic activity, he argues, but in real personal communion with the Father through the Son by the Spirit. He urges readers to “get in the habit of thinking expectantly about Christ’s ability to supply all your needs.” That, and asking God for it through prayer, is what produces Christian growth.