Students of our sins

Two days ago I caught my 8-year-old cheating on his math schoolwork. We homeschool, which means that while other children get out of school when the school calendar draws to a close, our children get out when Mom says so. They're getting near the end, though, and they're ready for a break. Maybe that's why Eli succumbed to the temptation to fetch our teacher's manual and copy the answers to his workbook problems.

He knew he was doing wrong. Worse still, he got the idea from his older brother, who started cheating the week before. Needless to say, their mother and I were terribly disappointed. I sent them to bed, and spent the evening and the next morning thinking over what to do.

Punishment is easy, but training a heart is harder. In part, it's so hard because all too often they learn their sins from us. They've never seen me cheat on a math problem (though the temptation is always there come tax season). But how many times have they seen me grow short-tempered when something arduous is taking longer than I'd like? No, I never directly taught them to cheat on a math test, but they've certainly learned from me how to selfishly sin when the going gets tough.

Today I made them erase all the answers from several pages in their math workbooks and do them over. They'll also be writing memory verses for a while. They seemed repentant, but the thing about cheating is that when someone does it, you find it hard to trust him any more.

I tried to explain this to them. I told them that when you cheat, you lie and steal all at once. You lie because you are only pretending to do what's right. And you steal because you are taking what belongs to someone else. I told them that when they cheat, they weaken themselves and make it easier to fall into the same sin next time.

I know far more about lying, stealing, and cheating than they realize. I also know how easily our sins can multiply, so long as we deal with them one after the other, feeling bad for this one, making amends for that one, putting up a safeguard against still another, doing all the "right" things except the only thing that will do us a lick of good, which is to fall on our knees, lay bare the dark recesses of our hearts, and pray that a merciful God will heal the sickness we are ourselves too terrified to see there.

It's easy to punish these little ones, dependent as they are on us for everything. But training their hearts is a weightier endeavor. Perhaps over a lifetime I could get it right, but we only have, we parents, these few waning years with them. And this is why every parent should be on his or her knees every morning and every night, praying for them, yes, but also for ourselves, that if nothing else we don't lead them more deeply into sin.

Editor's Note: WORLDmag.com is pleased to welcome back Tony Woodlief. Look for his columns on Fridays. Also, be sure to see his column in the current issue of WORLD.