Risk assessment

I filled out an investment questionnaire in an office last month, and yesterday's mail brought the verdict detailing what kind of person I am. I am "an investor with a medium-term investment time horizon and a moderate risk tolerance."

I don't think I like that. That is not the way I want to see myself. May as well curl up in a fetal position and die if I'm going to live such a pusillanimous and self-protective life. "To be safe, or not to be safe, that is the question."

It is advised that the best thing I can do in my condition is to allocate my money as follows: 10 percent cash (money markets), 30 percent fixed income (bond mutual funds/CDs), and 60 percent equities (stock mutual funds). Page 2 is a list of "investments we recommend for you," and I am to sign and return that portion.

I realize I'm not supposed to take all this so personally, but it cuts close to the bone. Is not the contemptible timidity of my financial investment self a cruel mirror held up to my spiritual self? Do I not hedge my bets in trusting Christ, too? Am I not a spiritual investor with a "medium-term investment time horizon," ready to bail out at any ill wind? Am I not a Christian of "moderate risk tolerance"?

I follow Christ up to a point but have a little something stashed on the side, just in case. I build my house 100 percent on the Rock, but when push comes to shove, I find it was more like 60 percent. The number is meaningless, of course, just a figure I pull out of the air. Fact is, one is either on the Rock or one is not.