A growing problem

Most people don’t need a circular saw to get a manicure. Then again, most people haven’t been growing their nails for more than six decades. Shridhar Chillal traveled from his home in India to New York City to get his world-record fingernails trimmed on July 11. According to Guinness World Records, Chillal stopped cutting the nails on his left hand in 1952. When last measured in 2015, Chillal’s thumbnail measured just shy of 6-foot-6. Officials at the Ripley’s museum in New York removed the nails with power tools. Chillal, 81, said he cut them in response to health problems caused by the immense weight of the nails, including nerve damage and hearing loss. The nails collectively measured nearly 30 feet in length.

Auto destruction

As House Speaker Paul Ryan plans a return to private life after the 2018 congressional elections, he’ll need a new car. Speaking to the Economic Club of Washington, D.C., on July 12, Ryan said a family of woodchucks had destroyed his Chevy Suburban. “My car was eaten by animals,” Ryan told the gathering. “It’s just dead.” Ryan had the SUV parked at his mother’s home in Wisconsin for the winter, and the woodchucks ate through enough wiring under the hood to render the Suburban inoperable and beyond repair.

A long siesta

A Spanish civil servant’s decadelong hooky streak has come to an end. For more than 10 years, Valencia province archivist Carles Recio would clock in at a government office, go home, and return at the end of the day to clock out. Despite never producing any work, Recio managed to collect his $58,000 salary for years. Finally last summer, Recio’s colleagues lodged a complaint and administrators fired the man. Officials decided not to prosecute Recio, but a civil court in July banned him from taking any government jobs for nine years.

Gator guest

Tracie Hoffecker was looking at a turtle in her Prospect Park, Pa., backyard on July 22 when she spotted another surprise animal guest a few feet away: an alligator measuring 2 to 3 feet in length. Hoffecker’s cousin, who is a Philadelphia firefighter, and animal rescue workers safely removed the gator, which authorities said was probably illegally dumped in the area by a pet owner.

Sweet smell of success

The Tournament of Roses has nothing on the town of Tabacundo, Ecuador. The United Press International reports the town built a replica of an indigenous pyramid using 546,364 roses. Guinness World Records says it’s the largest-ever rose structure, beating out a rose sculpture of a jet airplane built two years ago in the United Arab Emirates.

Head case

A ravenous raccoon needed an assist from local firefighters after getting its head stuck inside a mayonnaise jar. Ithaca, N.Y., firefighters responded to a call July 12 and found a raccoon hiding far up in a tree and with its head stuck inside the plastic jar. Fire crews worked with Department of Environmental Conservation workers to remove the animal from the tree, and then they placed it in a large plastic tub. From there, firefighters cut the raccoon free from the jar. After a quick examination of the raccoon, a conservation officer set the animal free in a nearby creek bed.

Pond predator

After eating all the smaller fish in a municipal pond, a giant catfish has turned to eating ducklings, according to city officials in Offenbach, Germany. City officials estimate the massive catfish at nearly 5 feet long and said July 16 they had hired a professional fisherman to catch and remove the beast. A spokesman for Offenbach said the city hopes it can find someone willing to take in the massive catfish and harbor it at a private pond.

Illegal procedure

Officials with the Arizona Department of Public Safety say Matthew Allen Disbro ran into trouble when he tried to pull over a car carrying two men on state Route 51 in Phoenix on July 11. The problem: Disbro wasn’t a police officer, and the two men he wanted to pull over were state troopers in an unmarked car. Police say when Disbro, 44, flipped on the police lights of his black Dodge Charger, the two troopers in a yellow Ford Mustang ran a check on the Charger’s license plate. Disbro reportedly drove alongside the Mustang and gestured to the troopers to pull over. That’s when the troopers turned on their own real police lights and pulled over Disbro. The fake cop was found with a fake uniform and charged with impersonating a police officer.

Testifying against himself

A cop in India has filed a complaint against himself after his office failed to prevent cow slaughtering. Officers in the northern India city of Meerut responded to a report of cows being illegally killed but arrived too late to catch the perpetrators. Local police Chief Rajendra Tyagi said his police agency responded to the tip too slowly, and therefore wrote up an official complaint against himself and his agency. Tyagi took over the Meerut station house with a promise to reform the station’s historic corruption and negligence. Tyagi has also filed 19 lawsuits against officers who have taken bribes.