MELANIA

Rated PG • Theaters

If you want to know more about Melania Trump, don’t go see her documentary. You probably won’t learn anything new.

Melania begins a few weeks before Donald Trump’s second inauguration. Ahead of the festivities, Melania hurries to dress fittings and meetings. We learn that she had a hand in planning various details of inauguration week, from the tablecloths at stately dinners to a few words in her husband’s acceptance speech. We learn that Melania has high hopes for her Be Best and Foster the Future initiatives, both aimed at helping children. She also squeezes in a quick meeting with a Hamas survivor.

During each scene, Melania herself narrates, reading from a presumably ghost-written script. I say this because after every overtly polished sequence of narration, I couldn’t help but wonder if Mrs. Trump really spends so much time organically reflecting on values like freedom and the importance of the Constitution. The narration, like the depiction of the First Lady, seemed a little too airbrushed. “No matter where we come from,” she narrates, “we are bound by the same humanity.”

It just seemed like Melania Trump had a list of things to declare: She loves and misses her mom, she’s a good mother, she hustles to get the job done, and her role matters. All of this while mostly meeting people and trying to make profound statements about the historical significance of her role as First Lady. Also, she hates wearing heels, like the rest of us little people.

I would imagine being the First Lady is a difficult position. Being in the spotlight nonstop must feel exhausting, and Melania Trump handles the attention graciously. But even up close, she never lets her glossy veneer down, despite making quite a show of trying to appear relatable. Every time she described something as “really emotional”—and there were several—she seemed to show zero emotion.

She’s got great taste in music, though. That said, it was probably a tasteful decision to go with the instrumental version of “Everybody Wants To Rule the World” for the pre-inauguration scene.

We don’t really get to hear anything significant about her pre-White House life or what it’s like to be married to Donald Trump. Since Melania herself produced the movie, it’s unlikely she would have shown us anything unflattering. All in all, the movie felt like one of those Vogue celebrity house tours, if those videos lasted almost two hours.