Insomnia and inspiration

Since March of 2005 I rarely sleep past 3 a.m., which I have complained about in more than one column for WORLD. I will welcome the restoration of normalcy when it returns. But I also wonder what I will lose.

What unquantifiable benefits will be forfeit once those hours from three to six are passed in unconsciousness? What communion with God, what whispers in the night? (What little essays I jot by lamplight?). Some harvest is already apparent: When you are beyond your ability --- whether in fatigue or any kind of suffering --- that's generally when you begin trusting God as more than an abstraction (2 Corinthians 1:8,9).

There is something about this time of day not available at other times, something more than just quietness. "Morning by morning he awakens; he awakens my ear to hear as those who are taught" (Isaiah 50:4). Jesus went out alone in the night to be with the Father. (Oh, for access into that sweet conversation!) I keep pen and pad handy by the bed in case He will speak, and pour out his thoughts to me (Prov.1:23). I play like Samuel, lying in the dark and listening for another word from him, from the living God:

"Speak, for your servant hears" (1 Samuel 3:10).