An insomniac's Psalm 103: Verse 10

"He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities."

If I thought that God dealt with me according to what I deserve, I would never pray. There is nothing on the list of things I pray for that I deserve. I pray for my kids to turn out well and to be saved, even though they grew up in a sham of a Christian house. I pray for my daily bread, even though I blew off my youthful opportunities to learn a trade that would help me earn my bread. I pray for health, though I have been a poor steward of my body in the past.

Funny, as I read verse 10, it is not my original conversion in the 1970s that comes to mind. That was, of course, a wonderful thing. But in some ways it was even more wonderful to me when he saved me the second time, a couple of decades later. One could almost forgive a person who acted out of "ignorance" (1 Timothy 1:13), but with more light comes more responsibility, and I sinned in the light. There is a stern warning in Hebrews 6 for people like me who have "tasted the goodness of the word of God" (v.5) and have spurned it. It teaches that those who bear thorns are near to being cursed (v.8). And such was I.

And to think that during my Hebrews 6 rebellion days, my days of most inexcusable mutiny, He was already planning the good things that he later brought into my life, bursting all my paradigms. Now I see that grace is really grace. There is no explanation. We are left with the conundrum that God is good because He is good.

Romans 5 bends over backwards to convey this asymmetry of our sin and God's goodness: If He loved us while we hated Him, what will He do for us now that we have something approaching love for Him?

"For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of His Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by His life" (Romans 5:10)

To read "Verse 11," click here.

To hear commentaries by Andrée Seu, click here.