The quiet exit

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NICK EICHER, HOST: Good morning! This is The World and Everything in It from listener-supported WORLD Radio. 

I’m Nick Eicher.

MARY REICHARD, HOST: And I’m Mary Reichard. 

Coming next: a quiet trend in American churches—easy to miss, but hard to reverse.

JANIE B. CHEANEY: My former neighbor, Ed, joined our church around the same time I did. He befriended my late husband and became one of the few people Doug remembered as his memory declined. 

On Sundays he would look for Ed after church, just to touch base with someone he knew.

Ed was going through some rough family issues and had just picked up a new hobby: pickleball. He told me he’d found something with his court buddies that he’d been missing, namely a sense of community and shared purpose. 

Shortly after, we didn’t see him at church anymore. No explanation—he just stopped going.

Ed is an example of an under-reported phenomenon: the so-called “silent exodus” of seniors from church. Most of them had been lifelong churchgoers. Like Ed, they had raised families that they herded into the car on Sunday mornings while their neighbors slept in. They had set aside their tithes and prayed for missionaries, conducted family devotionals and sent the kids to church camp.

But now there’s a significant shift among Christians over the age of 65. Gallup reports that in the year 2000, about 60% of American seniors attended church every week. By 2020 the number was 45%. Pew Research notes a similar drop of nearly 10 percentage points in that age group. 

What’s happening?

Pastors noticed a change after COVID, when many of their congregants didn’t come back once lockdowns lifted, but the trend had already begun. Some of it is understandable, as older baby boomers begin to lose their eyesight, hearing, mobility, and memory. Some are caring for spouses or even older parents. Others have lost partners and friends, along with the warmth of fellowship after half their Sunday school class has passed away. 

Even worse, they may feel that the whole church has grown away from them. All the focus is about attracting young families and building relevant teen ministries so the kids don’t drift away once they’re on their own. Seniors can feel out of place: mere pew-warmers and check-writers while the energy of the pastoral team is directed elsewhere.

And the loud music! And the new songs! And whose idea was it to bring in the strobe lights and fog machine?

Except for legitimate health concerns, none of it is any reason to forsake the assembly. But the assembly should remember that seniors still have a lot to give. And to receive.

As an old man himself, the apostle John acknowledged that all ages contributed to the vitality of a church. In his first letter he says, “I write to you, fathers, because you know him who is from the beginning. I write to you, young men, because you are strong and the word of God abides in you.” The old bring wisdom from experience; the young provide energy. The widow knows God’s faithfulness to a degree the new mother is just beginning to learn; the little children bring joy and purpose to her life with every  birthday party invitation.

We seniors needn’t fade away or look for community on the pickleball court. We have a responsibility to reach out to the young—and they have the responsibility to respond.

For WORLD, I’m Janie B. Cheaney.

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