Overcoming loneliness and rejection

LINDSAY MAST, HOST: Today is Wednesday, March 5th.

Thank you for turning to WORLD Radio to help start your day.

Good morning. I’m Lindsay Mast.

MYRNA BROWN, HOST: And I’m Myrna Brown.

Coming next on The World and Everything in It: Turning worry into worship. It’s not just a catchy tagline, it's what the Bible tells us to do.

MAST: And it’s often easier said than done. Today, the story of a man who’s spent much of his life writing and singing about a truth he’s finally able to experience.

NATE MOORE: I’ve done a lot of therapy work around the first act of my life was to be given up.

BROWN: Nate Moore spent his first six months in the Indiana foster care system, never meeting his biological parents or his half brother.

MOORE: You’re alone. You’re not enough. No one is coming for you.

Those are the lies he grew up believing. Even though a Christian couple adopted him and later gave him a new home in Georgia.

MUSIC: Feels like coming home, coming home…

It was a home filled with singing.

MOORE: It was kinda like not an option once my mom figured out I could sing decently. It's like, oh you’re going to be in the church choir.

Then one of his church moms turned him on to gospel music, from the front seat of her SUV.

MOORE: And that was the first time I’d ever heard anybody sing like that. I remember, like her teaching me how to run, like with singing.

MYRNA: What does that mean…how to run?

MOORE: Like how to sing when somebody’s like oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

MUSIC: In the valley of dry bone

Moore says that back seat vocal coaching helped develop his soulful sound.

MOORE: I started out leading worship in high school and then went on to college.

While in college, he started attending impromptu gatherings called house churches.

MOORE: Very organic, similar to the early church that we see in the book of Acts. Like you kind of invite your neighbors, you invite friends from class. Come over, we’re going to sing and pray and just eat together. I kind of stepped up into a new role with artistry and music and leading worship.

Then, came songwriting.

MOORE: Had no clue what I was doing. Had never taken a course, never studied it in school. It was almost like I was writing and singing my prayers.

MUSIC: All your promises are yes and amen…

In 2013 Moore and half a dozen other singers, songwriters and musicians formed the group Housefires.

MOORE: We weren’t a band. We had no vision. The mission was just like we want to bless our church with these songs. We had no idea it would go global and within a year we’d be opening for bands in arenas all over the world.

In 2019 he won a Dove Award and was nominated for a Grammy. But while his musical career was soaring, deep down he was still fighting rejection.

MUSIC: When I’m scared about the future. When I’m running from the past. When I’m restless in the present. Trying to make each moment last…

He also co-wrote the song, Watching Over Me with fellow-songwriter and singer, Jason Upton.

MOORE: Jason’s also adopted and we’ve connected a lot over that.

MUSIC: [Watching Over Me]

MOORE: It’s like talking about that anxiety, like so afraid of the uncertainty of what could come from life. All the unanswered questions and all the what ifs. We say later in the verse, God reminds me of the promise. And then it goes into the chorus, you’re watching over me, you’re watching over me. But it’s just like addressing the deepest wounds in my heart.

Wounds rooted in rejection from his birth mother and being bullied in school. The pain was so deep, Moore walked away from ministry.

MOORE: And I laid music down for a season, for about a year and a half. But through therapy, through prayer, through just inviting God into those wounded places, saying like God would you help me reinterpret this?

The 36-year-old says he’s learning to acknowledge the uncertainty of life, while trusting fully in God.

MOORE: It’s like we have no clue and very little control with what happens. And so to trust God and say God I give you my heart, soul, mind, body…all of me as worship.

It's an ongoing battle.

MOORE: I still do get lonely. I still can be tempted to get stuck in depression and days where I wake up and I feel more hopeless than hopeful.

Today, he’s thankful for a new season of life.

MUSIC: Heads stuck up in the clouds. All the fear and the doubts had me on my knees…..

Earlier this year, Moore released his debut single as a solo artist, Simplify.

MOORE: It just kind of very basically sums up what I’ve learned the last two or three years. Alright God, recreate this whole thing, rebuild the house, re-prioritize everything for me, recenter me in my focus. And Simplify came out.

MUSIC: Simplify…simplify

And late last year, another first. He found his brother on social media.

MOORE: And I was like gosh, I don’t know. I just never want to be a burden. Another one of the lies of my life is that I’m too much. Like, that’s the core woundedness, like I’ve mentioned several times. I didn’t want to be rejected.

But he reached out anyway. After a phone conversation and several text messages, Moore and his brother planned their first face to face.

MOORE: I’ve traveled all over the world but somehow I’ve never landed in Cleveland.

Moore’s girlfriend captured the moment on her phone.

AUDIO: [Long time no see..Right…]

MOORE: He actually said… you can’t hear it in the video, long-time no see. So I chuckled. I just thought it was funny that we have the same sense of humor. I just gave him a big hug. By the end of the weekend, he legitimately said to me, I am not trying to convert or anything, but he’s like, man I want what you have. He’s like this Jesus thing… is really interesting to me.

Moore says that’s music to his ears and even better than a Grammy.

Reporting for WORLD, I’m Myrna Brown.

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