Investing in boys

NICK EICHER, HOST: Today is Tuesday, August 27th. Thank you for turning to WORLD Radio to help start your day.

Good morning. I’m Nick Eicher.

MYRNA BROWN, HOST: And I’m Myrna Brown.

Coming next on The World and Everything in It: replacing the scouts.

The organization Trail Life began in 2013. It was an alternative to the Boy Scouts and a reaction to the LGBT course the scouts were charting.

Trail Life says it’s “undergirded by biblical values and unapologetically reflects a Christian worldview.”

In a little over a decade, Trail Life has continued to grow, now totaling about 60-thousand members across the U.S.

EICHER: WJI mid-career graduate Rachel Coyle talked with a South Carolina troop master who believes it’s his calling to teach young men their value.

AUDIO: [Sizzling] Someone with nasty chicken hands add some more here? Sure!

RACHEL COYLE: When 50 campers are hungry at the end of a long day, the pressure is on.

The aroma of sizzling meat makes the wait for dinner a little bit harder.

LEADER: Not the typical camp meal. My wife was thinking, are we gonna cook for 50 people over the campfire? I said, “Oh, no, not with Casey around.”

He’s referring to Casey Wiley, Troopmaster of the local Trail Life, who organized this camping trip. He’s also a gifted chef. Tonight’s dinner is hibachi chicken and fried rice. Trail Life leaders slice 20 pounds of chicken into bite-sized pieces for the grill. Thirteen-year-olds Gabriel and Matthew scrape and flip mounds of rice. This trip is a chance for boys to observe servant leadership and participate, too.

Troopmaster is just one of the leadership roles Casey has willingly stepped into. He doesn’t take on the leadership roles for himself; he does it to set an example for growing boys to follow.

CASEY: I keep doing it, because it's important. We work with these kids, we get to show them what Christian men are…

In a culture that struggles to define masculinity, Casey Wiley is up for the challenge of being a strong Christian male role model. That’s something he says he and many other men didn’t have when they were young.

CASEY: There was a good example of male leadership. There wasn't a good example of male Christian leadership when we were growing up. You know, it was missing. It’s why a lot of us dads have struggled with it and coming in as being the leaders of our family, and we want to equip our sons better.

AUDIO: [Sound of Wiley home]

Casey and his wife have four sons — and three daughters. Casey’s day job is manager of financial aid at a medical school in Greenville. Although it’s tough to balance the demands of work and family, Casey sees time spent in leadership as a way to equip the next generation of young men.

CASEY: We know that a good investment and thinking about retirement and that sort of thing takes time. It takes a lot of time, and it takes our resources. If you think about it from the time quotient, we need to be investing in our boys. When we don't invest in our boys, we end up with the society that we have right now, where men are being essentially shunted to the side.

Casey also believes that our culture throws around the phrase “toxic masculinity” without clearly defining it. And while it’s important to call out toxicity, he says it’s even more important to call it what it is: sin.

CASEY: What it's led to is our boys are hearing only that their masculinity is toxic.

When society perceives masculinity is toxic, Casey warns that ultimately, society views men as toxic, unnecessary, disposable. The well-being of society itself is at stake.

CASEY: Men have become more absent from the family, and we’ve seen a degeneration of the family. How much worse will it get?

Casey teaches the boys that masculinity isn’t toxic, sin is. And if boys exhibit harmful traits, he lovingly calls it out. He sets expectations to gauge the growth of Christian leadership for the boys in his troop.

CASEY: Are they willing to admit when they're wrong, and take direction and learn all of which are good leadership traits that we're trying to teach them, and what we should expect in terms of Christian male leadership.

For men who might be a bit reluctant to take on a leadership role, he has some good advice:

CASEY: What did Christ do? He served. Leadership is first jumping in and serving, wherever there's a need, you fill it, as best you can.

Leadership roles may require a lot of time, and if anyone knows how challenging that can be, it’s Casey’s wife, Stacy.

STACY: In some seasons, it’s just not the time to be saying yes to everything. And in other times, with prayerful consideration, God's going to meet your needs and make it to where you can serve, and be there for your family. Although, I highly recommend including your family as much as you can.

Some may be hesitant to step in and serve, or stand up and lead because they feel ill-equipped or inadequate. But maybe that’s a good thing.

CASEY: I’m constantly reminded of the fact that I need to rely on God.

Ultimately, that develops the humility servant leadership requires, and will make any man equipped for the task that lies ahead.

CASEY: The difference between Christian male leadership, and secular male leadership is all about modeling who Christ is. And again, we're still sinful, Christ was not, we're going to apologize, Christ never had to. But we can model something in apology, that will help our boys be better leaders in the future that will help them be better Christian men leaders themselves, and better husbands, which is a key thing.

Back at the campground, conversation picks up around dinner. One Troop Leader observes the importance of brotherhood among Christian men who lead.

LEADER: As dads, we all have our shortcomings. But when we come together like this, they get to learn from other men things that I’m not good at as well as see that there’s other men in this world that love God and love their families.

Reporting for WORLD, I’m Rachel Coyle in Boiling Springs, SC.

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