Sunday is coming, don’t be weird

Over the years, studies and statistics have regularly shown that most people who visit a new church do so because a friend or family member invited them. The same studies show that most unchurched individuals would come to church if someone close to them extended an invitation. So, what’s the hold up? Why aren’t more people extending the invitation? Reasons might be embarrassment, fear of rejection, or just good old-fashioned apathy. But I’m convinced that if you gave church members truth serum, one answer would surface again and again.

They’re scared something weird is going to happen.

It’s a terrible feeling to build a relationship with someone, muster up the courage to invite them to church, explain what they can expect to happen once they arrive, sit down for the service, and then have something incredibly bizarre happen that you’ll going to have to spend the entire car ride home apologizing for and trying to explain.

My Instagram algorithm constantly feeds me videos of cringy things happening in church services. There are entire accounts dedicated to aggregating these unfortunate instances. Every time I see one, I can’t help but think about the nameless person who is sitting in that room, dying inside, because they can’t believe this is the week their friend finally came to church, and now they’re experiencing a viral video in real time.

I am not saying that we should curate our worship experiences to appeal to the lost. I believe that Scripture teaches that the weekly gathering for worship is primarily for the edification of believers. I’m not saying that we should make the gospel less offensive. The Bible says repeatedly that the truth of the gospel will offend the lost. I am saying, “Don’t be weird.” Present the gospel of Jesus Christ and trust God to honor that.

I believe that the antidote for being weird is embracing the ordinary. Most weird things happen when pastors and churches try to innovate, differentiate, or placate. But God has told us in his Word what a Sunday is supposed to look like. It involves prayer, praise, giving, the practice of the ordinances, and the preaching of God’s Word. When people leave, the thing that should occupy the forefront of their mind is that Jesus was the center of attention.

I’ve tried to adopt a Sunday philosophy I first heard from my friend and fellow pastor Dean Inserra. He told me that at his church they strive for, “No disclaimers. No apologies.” The goal is to plan and execute a Sunday experience that, prayerfully, requires neither.

You don’t want your members having to give ten disclaimers on the way to church about the quirky or downright strange things they can expect to happen when they get there. “There’s this guy named Steve that’s going to try to hug you. I know it’s weird, but that’s just Steve.” Talk to Steve and tell him to stop it! “They’re going to make you stand up and introduce yourself. I know it’s embarrassing, but that’s just what we do.” Stop it! Do your best to eliminate the disclaimers.

The same goes for apologies. Work to eliminate needless situations and scenarios that would necessitate them. I know you can’t prevent anything weird from ever happening. People are weird. We do weird stuff. Sometimes we say weird things. And we can’t ignore the reality that even as we embrace the ordinary, it will seem strange to unbelievers. We believe that Jesus died, was resurrected from the dead, ascended into Heaven, and will one day return. We are not called to do anything with these truths except to proclaim them faithfully. And we must trust the power and work of the Holy Spirit. He moves in extraordinary ways through the means of the ordinary.

Sunday’s coming. Don’t be weird.